My old friends are too embarrassed to see a doctor about their prostate problems, and several of them have poor flow when they urinate. Others are very worried about the side effects of prostate surgery such as impotence. I have recently had prostate surgery with no problems.
You have put the problems of men’s health in a nutshell. The golden rule is ‘If in doubt, check it out.’ Prostate cancer is certainly a significant problem in older men, but may occur in men as young as 40. The main symptoms are difficulty in starting the flow of urine, and then instead of a jet of urine, a dribble that splashes on your shoes instead of the porcelain.
There are other causes for these symptoms other than cancer, particularly an enlarged prostate gland which is not cancerous, but the only way to find out for sure is to be examined by a doctor.
The examination will consist of an examination by the doctor placing a gloved and lubricated finger through the anus (back passage) to feel the gland, and a blood test. If there is any suspicion of a problem, further tests such as an ultrasound scan, will be performed. If a prostate cancer is found early, it can be removed. There may be side effects of surgery such as impotence and difficulty in controlling the urine flow, but these are more common if a bigger operation is necessary for an advanced cancer. If impotence occurs, there are tablets and injections available that will enable the man to have a normal erection and sex life.
Remember, if delay in making the diagnosis because you do not go to a doctor leads to complications, or even premature death, the only person to blame is yourself.

I had my prostate gland removed by an open operation that left a scar across my belly. Now, six months later, I have an egg-sized lump at one end of the scar for which I am wearing a corset. What should I do with this lump?
It is possible that you have a cyst in the scar caused by a stitch that has been left behind, but the far more likely explanation is that you have an incisional hernia.
In older people, the frail tissue may break down after an operation, allowing part of the bowel to escape through the deeper layers of the wound to the area just under the skin. If the lump goes away when you lie down, but recurs when you stand or exercise, the problem is almost certainly a hernia.
The development of such a hernia can be caused by a wound infection, but is often just bad luck, as the deeper tissue gives way under the strain of supporting your belly after an operation.
The lump certainly needs to be checked by a doctor, but if it is causing only minimal discomfort, a corset may be all that is required to control it. In other circumstances, further surgery, often with insertion of some surgical mesh to strengthen the area, will be required.

I’m an old codger, stuck in a nursing home—but I’ve still got my wits! Ever since I had my prostate out, I have to have a horrible tube up my private bit to get rid of my piss. My doctor says it has to stay in, and keeps pushing them in and out every month. How can I get rid of this tube for good?
There are a number possibilities here, but the most likely is that you cannot pass urine normally because of a bladder that will not contract properly after the operation. The prostate is certainly responsible for a lot of problems in older men, and if it is enlarged, you sometimes cannot pass urine at all because of its size, and after the operation the bladder may be so slack that it cannot force the urine out.
It is often unfortunate that the body gives out before the brain, leaving you having to deal with the embarrassment and inconvenience of urinary catheters. They have to be changed every month because if they are left for too long infections can develop, and the rubber of the catheter deteriorates.
I fear that you will not be able to get rid of the tube for good, because if there was any way in which this could be done, your doctor would have tried it. Ask your doctor why the catheter is required, and ask if you can try for a couple of days without it—you may soon wish to have it back in again.